Andy "Derby" Derbak (jokerman05) wrote in dazeofanew,
Andy "Derby" Derbak

Collection of Poems

"Tonight, Tomorrow, Yesteryear"

Tonight I held within
the withering feelings and self-doubt
the lasting effect of fading in my mind
the simple answer locked behind thought

It would've been so easy to say what I meant to say, but stating the feelings I felt wouldn't have made things okay.
I tried to convey the thoughts running through my mind but in time I find the hunt is much more exciting find.

Tomorrow is the sin
that I have not committed but bout
that innonce and bliss lost in crime
that stupid little battle that is still fought

I once thought I was right in stating how much I cared about life, but now the thought has retired and lived out all it's hype.
And in the past we will laugh about the time we spent together, not mourning, apathetically under this weather.

Yesteryear was the time
when we spent all our lives in the crowd
when we ran inside after the clock's tenth chime
when I was still alive, or so I thought

"Summer Epitome"

Walking up the street to the neighbors
The sun sets upon the street
Everyone has gathered to watch meat sizzle
and to smell the sweet incense of summer

They gather, shake hands, and slowly walk away to start more pointless conversations
"Cards are going to take it all this year"
"No way, Mets got it all over"
"Guys, with the 'roids about, baseball isn't even gonna be the same"

The men get so into the conversation they scream
My ears burned at first
They ended up settling differences and guzzling their juice
It comforted my sight

My mother walked up to me to kiss me and show me around like a prized trophy that she had won in the annual cook-off
I was none of the sort
She introduced me to young Katie James, blonde hair extraodinaire
She smiled at me as I felt my heart skip a beat

We ran off to the toy room, the one filled with retro memories and such items that parents think kids would still like
She pulled out the 70's doctor kit
She took my pulse and put the stethescope under my shirt
She could hear my heart failing

She slowly moved the cold stethescope downward towards my belly
My reaction came
She sat there crying and my heart fell
Playing with girls always leads to accidents

"But.. But.. But... I tried pushing the thingy away and accidentally hit her in the eye, Mom"
"No but's, you apologize. You keep this up and you'll have no more friends by the end of summer."

I began walking up to young Katie James, with tears still touching her blonde hair.
I mustered up the strength; I gave her a hug
I said I was sorry and quickly ran away
So as to save myself any more skipped heartbeats and embarassments from other people


Today I held my head up high
just to concern you
and strengthen my alibis
You never expected me to come out like this
never expected me to fly

Hold your glove in front of me
so that I may pick up the scent
following the path to heaven
And showed me the life you Lent

Today I held my head up high
just show you I could
and notice I didn't cry
My strength is questioning your life
and your house I've denied

Hold your glove in front of me
so that I may pick up the scent
following the path to heaven
And showed me the life you Lent

I don't, I don't need to listen
merely observe
I won't, I won't listen
to what you want me to learn
I live life on my own
my own terms
So I'm breaking away
from the bush that burns

Today I held my head up high
just to let you know I am here
But alas, I question why
For your divinity has reigned over politics and life
all for a Church that lies
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